Communicate with a partner is not always easy. The condition of the couple who are tired, an environment that does not support and misunderstandings are often the trigger for a household quarrel.
Expert on marriage, Sharon Rivkin, MA, MFT in his book ' Breaking the Cycle ' Argument writing, a good way of communicating without involving debates with partner. As quoted from sheknows, following smart way when communicating with your husband.
1. Heard Without Interruptions
It is more difficult than you think. "Most people don't have the ability to hear is good, and one of the cast could make someone take over the talks, and then tell you about themselves," said Rivkin. If you are one of them, try to count to five if you want to talk dodge husband, and let the couple talked until completion.
2. use the word "I"
Instead you use a sentence that cornering the couple, better to use the word ' I ' and talk about what you feel. In doing so, he will not feel the need to defend yourself and minimize the risk of misunderstanding. However avoid too focused on the word ' I ' in order that the spouse does not feel that you are a selfish person, therefore combine the words ' I ' with the phrase the question, "what about you?"
3. do not Attack your partner
As emotions peaked, you usually do is talk with your spouse while you use the words ' attack '. Although it can help overflow emotions, these habits can instead be muddy atmosphere. You will continue to blame the couple, and he will defend himself. Therefore, control your emotions.
4. tell me what you Think
You are liable to say all the things perceived and thought against the couple. My husband could not guess what is mind. The attitude of a cover-up only makes you tortured, and my husband does not understand what is happening. Therefore, avoid hiding feelings to couples, be open and honest.
5. Be Fair
Rivkin suggest that you avoid blaming or shaming attitude, always felt right. "These things are a big obstacle to making good communication and I guarantee there will be a sense of hate, anger and frustration in the relationship if it happened," he said. On the contrary, if it is time take turns talking, and you feel don't agree, ask questions and discuss if deemed necessary. It is better to do than You must be cursing and then regret it.
Expert on marriage, Sharon Rivkin, MA, MFT in his book ' Breaking the Cycle ' Argument writing, a good way of communicating without involving debates with partner. As quoted from sheknows, following smart way when communicating with your husband.
1. Heard Without Interruptions
It is more difficult than you think. "Most people don't have the ability to hear is good, and one of the cast could make someone take over the talks, and then tell you about themselves," said Rivkin. If you are one of them, try to count to five if you want to talk dodge husband, and let the couple talked until completion.
2. use the word "I"
Instead you use a sentence that cornering the couple, better to use the word ' I ' and talk about what you feel. In doing so, he will not feel the need to defend yourself and minimize the risk of misunderstanding. However avoid too focused on the word ' I ' in order that the spouse does not feel that you are a selfish person, therefore combine the words ' I ' with the phrase the question, "what about you?"
3. do not Attack your partner
As emotions peaked, you usually do is talk with your spouse while you use the words ' attack '. Although it can help overflow emotions, these habits can instead be muddy atmosphere. You will continue to blame the couple, and he will defend himself. Therefore, control your emotions.
4. tell me what you Think
You are liable to say all the things perceived and thought against the couple. My husband could not guess what is mind. The attitude of a cover-up only makes you tortured, and my husband does not understand what is happening. Therefore, avoid hiding feelings to couples, be open and honest.
5. Be Fair
Rivkin suggest that you avoid blaming or shaming attitude, always felt right. "These things are a big obstacle to making good communication and I guarantee there will be a sense of hate, anger and frustration in the relationship if it happened," he said. On the contrary, if it is time take turns talking, and you feel don't agree, ask questions and discuss if deemed necessary. It is better to do than You must be cursing and then regret it.
